You are now with the ever charming DJ Toshio in our late night segment Message of Love, love is in the air, brought to you by Cornelitto, where love is in every bite. We have our second caller for tonight. Hello? Who’s on the line?

Yo? I’m a Homo sapien from Kanagawa.

A what?

A Homo sapien. Geez, you don’t study science or what?

Okay, Sapien-san. So who’s the special one you’re dedicating this message to tonight?

I would love to dedicate this to another Homo sapien currently residing somewhere in Tokyo.

I see. Another one of your kind, eh? So what’s the message?

The message goes: So you’re not replying my sms. Don’t worry, I used to do that to others, too.

To let you know, I’m that dreading Energizer bunny. You kick me, I’ll just stick to where I am until my mission is accomplished.

This is what you get when you crossed a Choleric with a Melancholy.

Wow, a minute there, ma’am. You can’t just threathen someone on air!

Hold your tongue, Toshio-san! I’m not threatening anyone.

Labelling your message as creepy will be an understatement. This is a love-in-the-air channel.

Yeah, whateve. It’s the only channel I can get through. Besides, can’t you just feel the love inside the message?

Alright freaky head. Better get this over with. What’s the song you would like to dedicate to Sapien2-san?

My Best Friend Plank. Thanks, Toshio-san!

All right fellas. Listen up to My Best Frind Plank while I go and grab myself an aspirin. Right here on Nippon-Go.fm!

I’m never bored when I’m with you
We’re pals, we’re buddies through and through
I wish I knew what to buy for you
On your birthday

Our friendship goes against the grain
I’ve seen you swell up in the rain
I saw you - didn’t see your pain
Was it termites

It’s never hard to talk to you
Though you stump me with your silence
I feel so naughty pining here
For your happy face’s guidance

My best friend Plank
My best friend Plank
My best friend Plank

Sitting there so silently
What could you be thinking
You’re not saying; I won’t axe
Is that sealant that you’re drinking

Man, you’re hammered! Nailed you, pal
Al Gore’s wife’s name is "Tipper
I knew that we’d be best friends for life
When I saved you from that chipper

My best friend Plank
My best friend Plank
My best friend Plank

Ooo, Plank
Count the rings, count the rings
Ooo, Plank
Count the rings

I’d walk you on the seven seas
But sawdust always makes me wheeze
I met your mom and dad the trees
But please don’t get Dutch elm disease

My best friend Plank
My best friend Plank
My best friend Plank
You’re my best friend, Plank

You’re still with me, DJ Toshio in our late night segment Message of Love, love is in the air, brought to you by Cornelitto, where love is in every bite. Now, is our third caller on line? Hello?

Hello. This is a Homo sapien from Tokyo.

Sapien2-san?

Yeah, me.

What is this, the war of the Sapiens?